Margaret Feinberg

I’m often asked about the importance of mentoring, and I think it’s something that our generation craves. We long for older, wiser people to come into our lives and walk alongside of us. We want them to love us, pray for us, challenge us, and root for us.

Yet a good mentor is hard to find. Part of the challenge is that our expectations are out of line. We may look to a mentor to be a kind of expert, sage, or counselor beyond their expertise, ability, or comfort level.

A good mentor is simply someone who will walk beside you who has a little bit more dust on them. They may have been down the same road or a different one, but they know you’re better off not taking it alone. They know when to speak, when to listen, and when to silently pray. Being a good mentor (or mentoree) isn’t easy. There’s always some stumbling and fumbling involved, but knowing that someone is for you and with goes a long way to smooth things over.

In our increasingly fragmented society, I don’t think a single mentor will do. We need several. People who can offer their expertise and wisdom and prayers in different areas of our lives-our relationships, our work, our spiritual growth.

One person I consider a mentor I turn to when it comes to publishing. Another when it comes to issues of being a woman in leadership. Another when it comes to studying the Bible in depth. Another when it comes to navigating life in general. These relationships have developed naturally though intentionally and I’m grateful for every one.

The best kind of mentoring and growth comes when we’re intentional about our relationships and recognize the importance of intergenerational friendships-with those who mentor us and those we mentor.

What have you found works for you when it comes to mentoring and being mentored?